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Hi friends. This blog is a labor of love and I want to continue writing every day for a long time to come. But I need a little help. The fees to maintain this website are getting costly for a little frog. If you enjoy reading my blogs, will you please donate a dollar or two, or whatever you can, to help me keep this site (and blog) up and running? I'm on PayPal at irwinquagmirewart@gmail.com. Thank you!

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Days Worth Celebrating.

9/29/2017

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Here we are at the end of September already. This year is flying by! But before we get into winter, and all the end-of-the year festivities, October offers us many reason to celebrate the beauty of autumn.
October Calendar of Special Days
1.  National Hair Day, Fire Pup Day, National Homemade Cookies day
2.  National Custodial Worker's Recognition Day, National Name Your Car Day
3.  National Techies Day, National Boyfriend Day
4.  National Taco Day, National Golf Lover's Day, National Walk To School Day, National Pumpkin Seed Day (Yum!)
5.  National Get Funky Day, National Do Something Nice Day (Always a great day to celebrate), National Apple Betty Day.
6.  National Plus Size Appreciation Day, National Mad Hatter Day, National Noodle Day.
7.  National LED Light Day, National Inner Beauty Day.
8.  National Fluffernutter Day, Clergy/Pastor Appreciation Day
9.  National Lief Erikson Day,  National Moldy Cheese Day, National Chess Day, native American Day, Columbus Day 
10. National Cake Decorating Day, National Purse/Handbag Day
11. National Fossil Day, National Bring Your Teddy Bear (or frog) To Work/School Day, National Stop Bullying Day
12. National Savings Day, national Freethought Day, National Farmer's Day
13. National Train Your Brain Day
14.  Be Bald and Be Free Day, National Costume Swap Day, National Motorcycle Ride Day
​15. National Cheese Curd Day, National I Love Lucy Day, National Grouch Day, National White cane Safety Day
16. National Dictionary Day, National Feral Cat Day, Boss's Day, National Clean Your Virtual Desktop Day
17. National Edge Day, National Mulligan Day, National Pasta Day, Black Poetry Day
18.  National Chocolate Cupcake Day, National No Beard Day, National Hagfish Day, Support Your Local Chamber of Commerce Day
19. National Get Smart About Credit Day, Get To Know Your Customers Day
20. National Mammography Day
21. National Pumpkin Cheesecake Day, National Reptile Awareness Day, National Sweetest day
22. National Nut Day, National Color Day, National Mother-In-Law Day
23. National Boston Cream Pie Day, National Mole Day, National TV Talk Show Host Day (For those of you who might remember, this is Johnny Carson's birthday., Swallows Depart From Capistrano Day, iPod Day
24. National Food Day, United National Day
25. Sourest Day, Chucky The Notorious Killer Doll Day (I never did get those movies...)
26. National Day Of The Deployed, National Mule Day, National Pumpkin Day
27. National Black Cat Day, National Frankenstein Friday
28. National Chocolate Day (Isn't this every day???), National Make A Difference Day
29. National Cat Day, National Hermit Day, National Oatmeal Day
30. National Speak Up For Service Day, National Publicist Day (I could use one of them!)
31. National Knock-Knock Jokes Day, National Magic Day, Girl Scout's Founders Day and, of course, Halloween!
Holy Smoke! With all these great days to celebrate this month, how does one make choices? After thinking it over a bit, i'll pare down my list to a reasonable number and then hop off to the Lily Pad Party Store to gather my supplies. It's going to be a very busy month. Have fun and stay safe, no matter what your personal plans are. I look forward to seeing you all back here on Monday.
                                      I wish you all a "SPOOK-tacular" weekend.
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Be the neighbor you'd like to live next to.

9/28/2017

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Today is National Good Neighbor Day. A day set aside to recognize the importance of being a good neighbor.  In days gone by, neighbors often became good friends, We knew their names. We relied on them for companionship. The neighborhood kids all played together and, often enough, got married when they grew up. They helped us out in times of need. Occasionally, we'd even borrow their lawn mower...or a cup of sugar. Many TV sitcoms, since the advent of television, have  been written about wonderful neighbors but the truth is, these days those kinds of neighborly relations seem lost forever. They don't have to be, however. The Huffington Post  lists the five top ways we can become the kind of good neighbor we, ourselves, would like to live next to:
1.  Start off on the right foot.  If you're the new neighbor, go around and introduce yourself. Set a friendly tone for the future. If the old old timer, sent the new folks a "welcome to the neighborhood" note...or go stop by and say hello. help them find the local grocery store, post office, schools, shopping, banks, etc.
2. Don't be the person who exits hastily so as to not have to engage in small talk. Be friendly and and at least say hello, even if you don't have time for a conversation. It can't hurt to give a smile and a friendly to the neighbor picking up their mail.
3.  Keep it down.  We've all had neighbors who are loud and unruly, They're no fun to live next door to. If you live in an apartment, keep floor noise down by using small area rugs. And be respectful of noise after 9 pm. If you are planning a party, let the neighbors know ahead of time and don't let it go on all night long.
4.  Remember what's outside your front door matters, too. No one likes to walk, or drive, by mounds of trash and garbage left at the curb. Keep it all together someplace out of sight, like your garage, porch, or storage building until trash day rolls around. Don't leave it there collecting rodents and flies all week.
5.  An ounce of warming is worth a pound of goodwill. If your neighbors are the ones throwing the party bash, ask them, nicely to quiet down before calling the police. And when they comply, let them know you appreciate it!  Exercise a little patience before blowing up at them. Kindness and understanding breeds more kindness and understanding. Someone once said, "We can pick our friends but we cannot pick our neighbors." That's why fostering a good relationship with those we share our community with is so important.
​But the real meat of this blog is something far more important and far-reaching. It's about becoming a global good-neighbor. With tensions rising everywhere and threats of war being hurled by leaders, immigration issues at the forefront of the news, and everybody seemingly out for their own best interest...I thought it might be a good idea to write a little about being a good neighbor to people (and frogs) around the globe...all those lives we will never know, but can still have an impact on.
Back in the 1930's, US President Franklin D. Roosevelt brought into being something called the Good Neighbor Policy. It radically changed the way foreign policy was looked at. This policy emulated the practices of towns, communities, and neighborhoods across the United States. The gist of the Good Neighbor Policy was as simple as the golden rule, "Do unto others as you would have them do unto you." This means that personal responsibility, common sense, and human decency must be the basis for any policy that deals with our global neighbors. All these years later, The Good Neighbor Policy can still provide inspiration for a better, less militeristic approach to international relations. It can also serve as a reminder for how each of us might want to live our lives. Cuban poet, Ana Monnar, said it best; "All human beings are my neighbors. We share the same planet." I simply don't understand why the leaders of today can't figure this out. I'm only a small green frog and I get it....
Remember that being a good neighbor starts with you. Think locally, but act globally.
Be sure and use #GoodNeighborDay on all your social media. And please kind to each other.
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Grrrrrr.

9/27/2017

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Wednesdays seems to roll around each week faster than any other day. ​At least this week, I got up on time and was well-prepared for Dharma Frog's visit. With the tea brewing and breakfast baking in the oven, I was ahead of schedule. Just as I was sitting down to wait for my teacher, when one of those pesky door-to-door solicitors hopped on my pad trying to selling me something. I immediately barked at him that it was a bit too early to be trying to hawk stuff and didn't he realize that most frogs hadn't even had their tea or coffee yet! His reply? "The early bird gets the worm, Sir, and that's why I'm here to tell you about this amazing offer...." Well, needless-to-say, I lost it. I completely lost my temper. And, as I was admonishing this poor frog for trying to do his job, who should show up but Dharma. Yep. He heard every angry and ugly word I had to say. I felt so ashamed. My esteemed teacher has taught me better than this.
After the sales frog left, Dharma pulled up a chair and, as I was beginning to pour the tea, quietly said, "Irwin, if a frog is patient in one moment of anger, he will escape a hundred days of sorrow." And so began my lesson for the week. Dharma reminded me about karma...another way of saying "what goes around, comes around," or "what you sow, so shall you reap." I knew that one of these days, I'd live to regret being ugly to that frog. Soon, someone would be ugly to me for no good reason and I will feel terrible...just like I'm sure that little sales frog felt as he left my pad this morning. But, like so many of us do, I acted out in haste...without thinking of the consequences.
Anger, as we know, is a strong emotion that arouses the nervous system and has effects on every part of the body; we see it in the person's face and their body language becomes very tense.  Anger is rarely subtle. We don't wonder whether or not someone is angry. We can tell without a doubt.   Sometimes we're told to "let off the steam" that keeping it bottled up isn't healthy. But we're now learning that blowing off steam, isn't necessarily better for us. Anger doesn't automatically dissipate when its unleashed. Venting words, or actions, won't make anger easier to manage. It only serves to increase the intensity of the feelings. Anger feeds on itself. Furthering aggressive behavior can bring irreversible damage to those in our immediate vicinity,  Men, more than women, mistakenly believe that anger is one of the emotions it's acceptable to display. Interestingly enough, they don't usually respond well when someone else displays anger towards them. Women, on the other hand, are taught in many cultures to suppress their anger. Often, they do such a good job of hiding it that they don't even recognize it in themselves. Anger, whether it's expressed or it's suppressed, can have profound negative physical and psychological effects on humans. (Frogs, too, of course!)
The sad upshot of this is that no one learns to manage their anger appropriately, myself included. Everybody gets angry, I dare say. So it's important to learn how to manage this often-volatile emotion in a way that doesn't cause injury to us or to others. Dharma tells me that anger can be positive. It is a great motivator for change. It encourages us to speak up about the things that are bothering us.  The trick is all in how we do it. 
After finishing his breakfast, Dharma gave me some pointers on how to best manage my anger. I'd like to share them with you.
  • Take three deep breaths When your angry, your body becomes tense. Breathing deeply with ease the tension and help lower your internal anger meter.
  • Change your environment.  The quickest way to uncouple yourself from an ongoing source of anger is to take a five-minute walk to get some fresh air. Stuck in traffic? Take a mental escape by turning up the radio and singing at the top of your lungs.
  • Know why you feel angry.  Track down the clues about the kinds of things, situation, people and events that trigger your anger. Anger often masks our deepest fears. In an angry-making situation, ask yourself what deep fears it might be stirring in you.
  • Let go of what is beyond your control. You can change only yourself and your responses to others, not what others do to you. Getting angry doesn't fix the situation and makes you feel worse. If someone constantly arouses your anger, focus on the troublesome situation and brainstorm solutions.
  • Express yourself.  Be sure to think first and use measured tones and words that are not emotionally loaded. In a nonconfrontational way state that you are angry and identify the situation that makes you angry and why it ticks you off.
  • Be cautious.  There are situations in which expressing your anger holds danger. Having a jealous or abusive partner is one. Vent to a friend instead of the person who wronged you; you may wind up with some solutions you never imagined.
  • Be assertive, not aggressive, in expressing yourself.  Assertiveness requires speaking in an effective, nonviolent way towards a constructive goal. It may help if you rehearse your response before delivering it.   And, finally,
  • Make positive statements.  Memorize a few positive statements to say to yourself when your anger is triggered. They will remind you that you can choose your behavior instead of reacting in a knee-jerk way. For example, you might say: "I can take care of my own needs" or "His needs are just as important as mine" or "I am able to make good choices."
After we finished our lesson, and all the tea, Dharma hopped off to see his next student. As I began cleaning up the kitchen, I realized that I needed to apologize to the young frog who came to my door this morning. It was something I had to do, not only for myself but, I hoped, It would make him feel better, too. I can't remember his name, but I remember the name of the company he works for. I'll give them a ring and find out how I can personally apologize to my very bad behavior this morning. I plan on working on my anger issues. I don't want karma coming back to bite me...nor do I want to be the cause of anyone else's unhappiness. Spewing out angry words is never helpful and we sure don't need anymore ill-feelings in the world. I am going to be the change I want to see in the world...starting right now.
​Peace.
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Avoid these varmints!

9/25/2017

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Frogs love bugs. We eat them by the bucketful. An average frog can consume a hundred bugs a day...maybe more, depending on the size of the frog. But humans? Not so much. Humans don't like bugs and it's kind of easy to see why. They are a nuisance and they can even bite or sting. While even though bugs can be a delicacy in some cultures, generally speaking humans are not big fans of insects. So why am I telling you stuff you already know? I recently read a fascinating article on a few common bugs that can actually be deadly to people. Given that fact that my readership is largely human, I thought it might be a good idea to share this information with you. So please indulge me and read on.
As I'm sure your well aware of, insects far outnumber humans. Fortunately for you, most of them are harmless and serve a useful purpose...not to mention they make a great meal for us frogs. But even though most bugs are harmless, there are three common bugs that you might want to really avoid. These bugs host and transmit pathogens that can cause disease. These teeny tiny insects can cause humans BIG trouble!
Bad Bug 1 - The Flea. These biting insects are awful...just ask Fluffy or Fido. But don't panic! The type of fleas found on pets, especially in North America, can cause allergic reactions to your family's four-legged friends, but they aren't likely to kill you. Cat fleas, as they're commonly known aren't a cause for your concern. It's a different story, though, with the Oriental rat fleas. These minute insects are infamous for caring the deadly plague. Flea rats carry a virus that caused the medieval outbreak in Europe, wiping out a massive 25 million humans. Thanks to far better sanitation practices and strong antibiotics, it isn't likely we'll see another outbreak of the plague.  That being said, people still die from the plague every year. Despite having powerful antibiotics, 16% of the plague cases in the US are fatal. In 2015, during one five-month period, there were 11 cases of the plague reported with three deaths. Plague-carrying fleas are found mostly in the western US, but anyone who engages in activities near rodent habitations should take precaution to avoid fleas!
Bad Bug 2 - The Mosquito. Did you know that the irritating little mosquito kills more people every than year than any other insect?  Mosquito-borne diseases kill over a million people worldwide each year. In addition to malaria, mosquitoes carry everything from dengue fever to yellow fever. Folks living in the US don't have to worry about malaria or yellow fever, but doesn't mean you should makes friends with these varmints. The Center for Disease Control have had 36,000 cases of of the West Nile virus reported with 15,000 cases resulting in death. Nearly 600 cases of the Zika virus have been reported in the States, but that's far less than in some countries. 
Bad Bug 3 - The Tick. Just the the mosquito, ticks can carry pathogens that cause diseases...some of which are fatal. The big issue here, is that tick-borne illnesses can be hard to diagnose and even hard to treat. Tick bites can go unnoticed and early symptoms of tick-borne disease can often mimic other, more common illnesses like the flu. Diseases caused by tick bites include: anaplasmosis, babesiosis, Borrellia infections, Colorado tick fever, Erlichiosis, Heartland virus, Lyme disease, Powassan disease, rickettsiosis, Rocky Mountain spotted fever, Southern tick-associated rash illness, tickborne relapsing fever, and tularemia. Please be sure you learn which ticks live in your area of the world, which diseases they may carry, and how to avoid tick bites. 
I didn't write this blog, dear reader, to scare you. You know that's not my style. This blog is only intended to educate you on the ricks of these insects. May I suggest buying a good quality insect repellent. And then remembering to use it every time you go outside, especially during the warm weather. Insect repellent, no matter how good, won't protect you if you don't use it.
Or, and this is my favorite suggestion, make a home for a bunch of frogs in your back yard. Having a small pond or water fall can be very decorative and the frogs and toads it will attract, can help cut back on your insect population! You'll still need the insect repellent, but you'll love having a few of my friends move in to keep you company. Spiders eat lots of insects, too. But let's face it. Wouldn't you rather have a few frogs around than a bunch of arachnids?
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If your happy, raise your hand!

9/25/2017

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Are you a happy human? Would you like, perhaps, to be happier but feel that maybe it's somehow wrong, or selfish, to want more happiness than what you experience already? We tend to assume that everyone wants to be happy, but in some cultures and religions, being happy is equated with self-indulgence...something with a selfish aim. These people believe that the happiness of others is more important. We can get wrapped up in the feeling that being too happy is a bad thing, especially when others around us seem less happy.
Selfishness is described in the dictionary as "the quality or state of being selfish; lack of consideration for others." That would lead us to believe that selfish people are mainly concerned with their own personal gain and pleasure. I've talked about this before, but the science of happiness (yes, there really is such a thing) shows us that those are not the characteristics of happy people. In act, selfish people tend to be more unhappy. We've learned through research that happiness spreads the same way as a virus does, but it's one disease we might want to willingly and knowingly spread. "Longitudinal analysis has shown that our happiness is affected by those we are socially connected to," so says the Framingham Heart Study.  That study showed that happiness spread from one individual to their friends up to three degrees of separation. It influenced the happiness of the person's friends, their friend's friends, and their friend's friends friends. (Wow! that's a lot of happiness!) Researchers concluded that happiness is largely influenced by the people (or frogs) we socialize with. This means we can become happier simply by spending time with happy people and then sharing that happiness with others.
Other research has shown that, rather than being selfish, happy people tend to be kinder and more generous. A study by researchers Isen and Levin, show us that after experiencing a positive event people were more likely to donate to charity. This effect was also evident in third-grade school children who, like their adult counter-parts, were more altruistic when they felt happy. Additional research has shown that self-care isn't selfish and actually offers the compassionate, self-caring human a greater capacity for helping and caring for others. We must be able to take care of ourselves first before we can take care of others.
Now that we know that happiness doesn't make us selfish, here's how our own happiness can benefit others.. because happy people tend to do these five things.
1.  Become involved in your community.
2.  Be more inclusive of others.
3.  Be less judgmental.
4.  Be more inclined to help others.
5.  Perform better at work.
These five character traits are not associated with selfish people. I've known more than a few selfish frogs and humans...and none of them would ever do any of these things. Why? Because they're too self-absorbed to even know that others even exist...except to serve them and their own blind ambitions. And I sure don't want to be that way...and I bet you don't, either! So be the change you want to see.
We've all heard that saying before. But here's a new spin on it. If our happiness "is the driver of altruistic and generous behavior, perhaps refusing to take responsibility for our own happiness is a more selfish act than trying to sustain or increase it." It's an unusual, but positive, way of looking at happiness and selfishness.
Becoming a happier human (or a happier amphibian) is in everyone's best interest. And let's face it, would it be good to live in a happier world?​
                                     I wish you all peace....and much happiness!
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An ancient and honorable martial art.

9/22/2017

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Ah, the weekend is finally here! And it's the first full weekend of the fall season. The air is getting crisp; it's time for picking apples and scouring the pumpkin patches for the most perfect specimens. With school back in full swing, the kids are all playing sports and looking for after-school activities. My little brother Quigley is no different. This year he's decided to try his hand...or flipper as it were, at Tai Chi. This weekend, I am taking him to a Tai Chi tournament in Lily Pad so he can witness some of the local masters performing this honored and ancient martial art.
Tai Chi is based on Qigong and martial art techniques from thousands of years ago. Yang style Tai Chi is the most common but in recent years, Sun style has become better known in the western world. It is also easiest to learn regarding its physicality. Tai Chi is also known as Shadow Boxing. Its name is derived from the philosophical term Tai Chi which first appeared in the Book of Changes over 3000 years ago. In this book it says 'in all changes exist Tai Chi, which causes the two opposites in everything.'  Tai Chi means the ultimate of the ultimate and is often used to describe the vastness of the universe.
The essential principles of Tai Chi are based on the ancient philosophy of Taoism, which stresses the natural balance in all things and the need for living in spiritual and physical accord with the patterns of nature. According to this philosophy, everything is composed of two opposite, but entirely complementary elements...the yin and yang....both working in a relationship which is in perpetual balance. It is this balance that makes Tai Chi so effective. Chen is the oldest and Sun is the youngest of the five major Tai Chi styles. Sun style is the form of Tai Chi little Quigley will study, at least to start with.
The creator of Sun style Tai Chi, Sun Lu-tang, was about 50 years old when he developed this new system and was already a well-know expert of two other internal styles. Sun style, while being new, also embraces these other to styles as well. Sun style has a higher stance, less kicking and punching which makes it perfect for older practitioners, as well as those looking for a milder form of exercise. And while it may not be as spectacular in its outward appearance, once a practitioner passes through the surface it is easy to get hooked by its depth.
Using the mind to direct the movements, both the Chen and Sun styles emphasize Tai Chi as an internal art with the conscious mind (yi) directing the Qi (energy), and the Qi to control the internal force (jin), and the internal force to move the body. Tai Chi's inner power is elastic and spiral.  With Tai Chi, the body posture is upright without being tense, the chin is slightly tucked in, and the crown of the head is gently pushed upward, loosing all the joints.
Tai Chi strengthens both the body and the mind and is considered to be a healthy form of exercise. To be efficient in martial arts, one must be strong to deliver force, and be able to absorb incoming force. The head needs to be clear to concentrate. Being strong with a clear head is something I think would benefit most frogs, and humans, in today's world. I am so excited to attend this demonstration on Saturday that I am thinking seriously of taking up Tai Chi, alongside my little brother. 
Whatever your plans are for this first fall weekend, I hope it includes some time outside and, perhaps, a little physical and mental exercise. Now, I'm off to get a head start on practicing my Sun Salutation.
                                                                  Peace everyone.​
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Trusting your inner GPS.

9/21/2017

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Walking away from that which no longer serves us is scary. There's a feeling of defeat. It can be a sense of loss. Too, it can feel like a punch in the stomach. For some humans, knowing when to leave and actually doing the leaving, occur at different times. And for others, they know it time to leave and then simply do it. After we've left school, the bad relationship, the unfulfilling job...whatever it is that doesn't "fit" anymore, we can feel guilty and judged. We think, "I should have stuck with it. I should have given it more of a chance. He/she wasn't really that a bad and it's better than being alone. Perhaps you live in the city and have a lucrative job, but you long to move to the country and grow vegetables, while living simply in the peace and quiet of nature. It's okay to not pursue the typical "dream job" or to want the fast-paced lifestyle living in the city offers. Not everyone wants the same things. 
Until you stop looking for validation from others will you ever be able to see what you're really doing. Humans, and frogs too I dare say, ask everybody around them for their opinion on what they should do...and then we often do whatever we're told...when, in fact, we already know the answer; we just don't don't like it. We completely dismiss our intuition. It feels uncomfortable; like, "How I could possibly know what to do...what's good or right for me?" But, really, who else knows you better? Who else lives with you day in and day out. Intuition is there to guide us but few of us dare to trust it.
There's a big revelation to be had when we do trust our "gut." We learn that it wasn't us who was failing and we're not a failure by leaving. In fact, just the opposite is true. It takes bold courage to know when to leave something that no longer serves us. It takes real courage and strength. Learning to listen to, and trust our inner GPS system (intuition), can take years of practice...especially if we're not coming from that one, right place. The place of self-love and security, of knowing we have all we need to sail our own ship. When we seek advice from others, they will respond based on their own experiences, their own history, their own judgments, and upbringing. If we ask them if we should stay in school, of course they'll say yes. If we ask them about leaving a bad job, we may here that good jobs are scarce or that nobody really likes their work. But they aren't us and even though friends and family can be well-meaning, they can't know what's right for us.
So how do you know when it's time to walk away? It's not difficult to figure out. When you sit quietly and your inner knowing tells you that the path you're on is no longer serving your greater good. 2. When what you're doing is no longer fun or fulfilling. When the very thought of it fills you with dread. 3. When you do whatever you can to avoid it, or them. 4. When you're physically ill from the anxiety and depression caused by the person or situation. 5. When you spend all your time complaining about it (or them) to your family and friends. 6. When you look in the mirror and say, "I can't believe this is my life. How did I get here?"  These are all pretty clear signs that your life is no longer working for you and a change is long overdue.
Healing, and the ability to move forward, begins with giving yourself permission to leave. Your inner self will thank you and you'll feel like a huge weight has been lifted off your shoulders. The man, woman, or frog inside of you will welcome you with open arms, "Where have you been," they will say, "I've been waiting for you and now you're finally here!" Learn to love the sound of your feet (or flippers) walking away from things not meant for you.
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I don't need another morning like this one!

9/20/2017

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It all began yesterday when I forgot to go to the grocery store. By the time I realized it, it was too late. I normally try to keep a well stocked pantry but this week I had let it get down to nearly nothing. What made this worse was that my esteemed teacher and friend, The Dharma Frog, comes on Wednesday morning and I like to serve him a nice breakfast but this week all I had to offer him was a little buttered toast with toasted cricket preserves. Then, to add insult to injury, I overslept this morning. I woke up with a start when I heard a loud "kerplop." Dharma had landed on my lily pad and here I was still in bed. I jumped up, got dressed, and hopped quickly to the kitchen. "Feeling a little disorganized this morning, Irwin?" he asked. "Yes, Sir, I replied. "I been very busy these past few days and I've let my life get a bit out-of-control." As rapidly as I could, I put the kettle on for tea, slid the bread into the toaster, and set he table. Dharma sat down and I tried to get myself awake as I eagerly waited for the much-needed tea to steep. "Tadpole, a hasty frog drinks his tea with a fork." "Huh?" was all i could think of to say. But then I looked around and immediately saw what he was looking at. In my haste to speed up breakfast, all I had put out on the table for silverware were forks and knives...no spoons, no plates, and no tea cups for the tea! Geez...this morning was going well at all! So I immediately hopped up and retrieved the missing dishes and spoons. Finally, the tea and toast were ready.
"Haste makes waste, Tadpole. This very old proverb dates back to 190 BCE. Even back then, frogs knew that hurrying can lead to mistakes.  Haste here means not only to do do things quickly, but to do them in a slapdash way. Waste can mean several things; likes loosing out on something or, as in your case, not doing something efficiently. When we fail to take a few moments to think out what we need to do, mistakes invariably occur. We should not be too hurried in our projects. That includes even the small and simple ones, like setting the table. Your haste in setting the table meant that you had to spend extra time getting the rest of the dishes and silverware, otherwise we'd be forced to drink our tea with the fork! Do you understand what I'm saying?" " I do, Dharma. You know that I'm usually far more organized than this. I don't know what's the matter with me today."
We may think that getting things done quickly is the most efficient thing to do, but in our haste we may plan things badly, make mistakes that need to be rectified at a later date and cut corners that will ultimately cause us to take much more time on the project in the long run. Cutting corners at home, at work or at school may results in wasted time and resources. Taking time over something can be enjoyable and more productive. Skipping a plan can result in overspending or poor use of resources. Being less hasty can save time in the long run as we spend less time correcting hasty mistakes. A study conducted by a couple of neuroscience professors at Vanderbilt University shows that the brain actually switches into a special mode when pushed to make rapid decisions. The brain uses the same basic method to make both deliberate and rapid decisions. In order to shorten the decision-making time, the brain simply reduces the cumulative amount of neuronal activity it requires before making a decision. Because the brain must make snap decisions based on less information than it uses for slower decisions, the likelihood that it will make mistakes increases. What this means is that identical information presented to the brain is analyzed differently under speed stress than under accuracy stress. 
Haste makes waste...or a hasty frog drinks his tea with a fork...seems like a simple message, but it has real and useful significance. It reminds us to take care with our work. It can also remind of the health and safety issues we will encounter if we rush through things. And, it shows us that when we hurry, we can miss out on my many of the good things in life. Taking a little time gives us the opportunity to fully appreciate life. Too, it's a great reminder to plan ahead and that helps us relieve stress when we do. I know I'm not likely to forget to do my food shopping again. I sure don't need another stressful morning like this one!
After Dharma left, I gathered myself together, made up my shopping list and was at 
the store at soon as it opened. It felt good to be organized and to have my life back on track.
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Keeping it real.

9/18/2017

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Let's face it, we all spend too much time online. Social media has become a big presence in lives of nearly everyone. It's a great way to keep in touch with family and friends. It's also a convenient way to follow trends, current news stories, and even to meet new people (and even frogs) from around the world who share the same ideas and beliefs we do. Social media means community. For the most part, I think social media does a great job of making the world seem smaller. But it can have a dark side, too. Today's blog is about how to stay happy on social media.
However with social media at our finger (or flipper) tips, it's easy to get carried away, almost to the point of addiction, with the stories of destruction and chaos happening all over. We all seem to have this same compulsion to know everything, as soon as it happens. Then, we feel it's our duty to share that news with our friends and followers. Pretty soon, everybody everywhere has all the latest details of whatever the current disaster is.
Did you know that as of 2016, 78% of the US population had some kind of a social media profile? It is estimated that now, in 2017, there are 2.46 billion social media users worldwide. And by 2020, the figure is estimated to rise to 2.95 billion humans...all connecting on one form of social media or another. (And don't even get me started on the frogs using social media....)
So who's on social media doing all those tweets and posts? Here's the breakdown; 68% of women and 62% of men. It's no surprise that 18-29 year-old's make up the largest share with 90% of them on social media. 77% of people ages 30-49 use it, along with 51% of those ages 50-64. And, believe it or not, 35% of humans aged 65 and above have some kind of presence on social media, as well.
Research from the University of Indiana shows that those people who have the most social media connections are actually happier.  So you don't actually have to unplug to have a calmer life. That's good news. But there some steps you can take to make your life, and time spent on social media, more manageable. 1. Choose two times a day to check your social media accounts and email. Don't check it every time you have a spare minute. That will make you crazy, along with everyone else around you. 2. Unplug completely at least one day a week. Turn off all the electronic gadgets and simply choose not to check what's happening on your social media accounts. 3. Follow accounts and people that interest and inspire you; not the ones that post negativity or things that bring you down. 4. Keeping up with multiple platforms can be time-consuming and exhausting, so limit yourself to two...three tops. 
Moods are contagious, even online. Research has shown that digital social networks influence the spread of both positive and negative emotions. There's enough bad news out there already. Do we really want to add more? It's OK to unfollow and unfriend (or just hide) those connections that bring you down. (Like that old chum from high school that never stops complaining.) Enough with the Negative Nellie, already! Sometimes it simply TMI (Too Much Information).
And did you know that your posts can reveal a great deal about your health habits? They do. Everything from the post about forgetting to take you medication to the (overly) salty treats you consumed while watching TV last night. That info is helpful to researchers in tracking widespread health habits. Those humans who are in a high-risk population, were more likely to get tested for HIV when they belonged to a social media group that encouraged testing and also had access to behavioral psychology that steered them in that direction. Even small interactions make us feel better because we get a sense of belonging. And that's good for our health, as well. I know I always get the warm-fuzzies whenever I get a nice message from my Twitter and Facebook friends. For many who are isolated, these digital social interactions are the closest thing they get to positive human (or frog) connections. It's not surprising, then, that social media posts are generally in keeping with the poster's genuine personality traits. Introverts betray shyness and extroverts seem outgoing.
Do you love social media? I do. I love how small it makes the world seem. I have friends all over the globe and social media makes it feel like they live next door. A recent preliminary study shows that the tendency to gravitate towards social media may be more nature than nurture. I found that fact pretty darn interesting.  
So how do we post, tweet, and still manage to remain happy? Here's what the experts say to do.
A. Accentuate the positive. Use your feed to savor special moments from a vacation or family get-together, not to compare yourself to others or to make others feel bad. Post uplifting quotes, funny jokes, even adorable cat pictures...just stay away from negative or hurtful posts.
B.  Schedule breaks from social media. Everybody needs a day off. It's alright if you don't post for a day or a week. Everyone will still be there when you get back. And if they're not, that just means they weren't "real" anyway. taking a break has shown to improve well-being.
C.  Be yourself.  Present your authentic self...not some perfect idealized version. Having others accept you for who you are boosts mental health.
D.  Come back to reality.  Be careful not to assess your relationship with someone based on whether they follow you or like your posts/tweets. Social media means something different for everyone and their motivation for using it can vary greatly. If the people are friends in real life, it's better to take your cues from those interactions, rather than the ones online.
Finally, here are a few statistics on managing electronic overload.
65% of those humans surveyed feel that taking a "digital detox" would be good for their health. The question is, will they do it? 28% of the survey participants said they don't allow cell phones at the dinner table as a way to cur down screen time as well as add to better family bonding time. 28% said they actually take a break from electronics when they're on vacation or a get-away weekend. And only 19% of the people surveyed said they turn off media notifications in an effort to manage technology use.
Social media can be wonderful and uplifting. Or it can be dark, dangerous, and depressing. The choice is up to each of us. I have chosen to post only things that I feel are helpful, hopeful, insightful, or funny. My only goal here is to improve your life anyway I can. And in doing that, dear reader, I improve my own ten times over.
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Yep. We've all got them...even us frogs.

9/18/2017

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Bad habits. We all have them. Yep, even frog have those little things we do that so annoy others, and often work to prevent up from reaching our full potential.  Research from Duke University shows that 40% of what humans do every day isn't a decision, it's habit. Another way to put it is, for nearly one-half of the day, humans are running on autopilot. (Honestly, I bet that figure is a lot higher for frogs.)
Other studies have shown that if you want to be more success at everything, developing good habits is one of the best ways to do that. As a example, humans who have career momentum are 53% more likely to have good habits.  I wanted to know more so I did some research and found a few ways to help change those bad habits into good ones.
1.  Change a bad habit.  (That's singular - as in one) Focus on fixing one thing at a time. Trying to change too much all at once can seem overwhelming and can cause our good intentions to fall as a souffle. The thing to remember is that all your bad habits were accumulated over a lifetime. So it's going to take a little time to undo them all. It's like learning to walk...take one step at a time. Give each bad habit a month or so to change, then move on to the next one.
2.  Don't stop. Just count.  Whatever it is that you shouldn't be doing (smoking, eating too many cookies, spending too much time texting friends, etc) you don't have to stop just yet. That sounds doable, right? Experts say that we shouldn't try to reduce the habit; we should try to reduce the variability of the habit. This is how that works; If you generally check your Facebook page 90 times a day, tell yourself you're only going to check it 90 times today. Or, if you're a smoker, don't tell yourself you're quitting...tell yourself you're going to smoke the same number of cigarettes today as you generally do. This teeny-tiny effort towards self-control can actually lead to a decrease in bad behaviors over time, unconsciously. Your brain won't feel as restricted, or as rebellious. The more you tell yourself no, the more you want to do it. So, by giving it some "freedom of choice" you'll find that you'll naturally begin to cut down on cigarettes, the number of cookies you eat, or the quantity of Facebook checks you do each day. You don't have to deny yourself. Just notice the numbers and continue to behave badly. Funny how that works....
3.  Don't change you. Change your world.  Okay, so let's say you're addicted to a certain social media app. Try this and see if it doesn't help. Delete the app off your phone every day, and then reinstall it again later that same day. This will sure cut back on the number of times you check Twitter or Instagram account! If the app is on your phone, it's just begging you to open it up. If it's not there, the temptation becomes greatly decreased. Downloading these apps can be painful and can take a little time. And that's no fun. Eventually, you'll get in the new habit of not having the app there, which means you won't keep checking it. As soon as you begin to forget about the app, it's probably safe to put the app back on and leave it there. If you go begin to slide into your old habit again. Delete it and start over. Get the tempting stuff away from you! Just don't expect miracles overnight. Change can take a while.
4.  Chill out! Most of us engage in our bad habits when we become stressed. I eat cookies when I get stressed out. UCLA neuroscientist, Alex Korb, says that staying relaxed helps the mind to make better choices. Don't put so much pressure on yourself and you'll start behaving better. When you feel the need to engage in your bad habit, and it's being induced by stress, take a break. Go do something else. Walking away from the issue, even briefly, can get your mind off your bad habit and onto something more positive.
5.  Don't eliminate bad habits. Replace them!  Saying, "I'm not going to do that again" makes you even more likely to do it again. So, instead of shoving that mini donut into your mouth, replace it with a piece of sugarless gum. The trigger stays the same, but instead of engaging in a bad behavior, you replace it with a harmless one. Habits cannot be eradicated...they can only be replaced. Notice what triggers your bad behavior, then replace it with something good!
6.   "If" and "Then." Plans are good. And a simple one can help you resist your temptation. For instance, when you sit in front of the television maybe you habitually eat potato chips....lots of potato chips. Give yourself a new game plan and change it to something more positive and healthier; "IF" I sit in front of the television, "THEN" I will will eat a handful of grapes. It's called if-then planning and, believe it or not, it can be a powerful way to help you achieve your goal. You might even cut down on the amount of time you spend watching the TV (or whatever your trigger is). Two small words than can mean BIG changes. And, finally,
7.  Forgive yourself. This can be a biggie for lots of us. We all screw up. And that's okay. Learning to forgive ourselves is so important. Take me, for example. I'm trying to cut back on the whole cookie-eating thing. But what happens if I eat one? Does that mean that all the good I've accomplished, up to that point, is erased? NO! it only means I messed up that one time. I pick myself up, dust myself off, and continue trying to cut back on the cookies. By shaming our guilting ourselves, we only pack on more stress and that can mean engaging in even more of our bad behavior. Forgive yourself. Forget about it. And move on.
Just remember, bad habits don't mean your a bad person...or a bad frog. Those nasty little habits that get in our way and prevent us from achieving our goals can be replaced. It can take a little time, practice, some patience, and a whole lot of self love. But it can be done. We can  become the human, or frog, we want to be... free of those old bad habits that hurt us and hold us back. All we need to do is try.  I'm already feeling better and more hopeful! And that bag of cookies that's usually screaming my name about now? I can barely hear it.
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    Land of Lily Pad's first published author. I enjoy writing fun and educational books for kids. My blog is for you parents; the kiddos might like some of them, too. As always, everything I write is family-friendly, so don't hesitate to share my messages with everyone. I hope you find them helpful and maybe even inspirational. Cheers! 

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